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Bad A** Championship Wrestling Presents: F.U. FULLY UNCENSORED!
Venue: Madison Square Garden
Location: Manhattan, New York
Date: February 12, 2012
Bell time: 8:00 PM ET
Welcome to FULLY UNCENSORED - 2012!
MAIN EVENT: 3 Way Championship Dance
Michael Barnes (c)
Vs.
Kurt Chavez (c)
Vs.
Gaetan LaValle
* 1st fall = Empire State Championship
** 2nd fall = BACW Heavyweight Championship
I Quit Match: Non-Title
Jack Kraven - NWA World Champion
Vs.
Magnum Randell
NWA World Hardcore Championship
Chris Ross (c)
Vs.
Kai Kennedy
BACW Tag Team Championship
The Logan Boys [Jace & Lashiel] (c)
Vs.
The Dark Alley Thugs [Kimo Newton & Carlos Ortiz]
Winner gets a shot at Empire State title at March PPV Grinder
Jason Phoenix
Vs.
Giani Di Luca
[Begin show...]
Dance with the Devil
[Coming off a very successful NWA WrestleClassic, Mr. Batee sits in his office going over some paperwork for the new NWA territory. Suddenly, the door kicks in and Kurt Chavez strolls in. He grabs a seat and pulls up really close to Mr. Batee desk.]
Mr. Batee: Oh, it's you. What the hell do you want, traitor?
Kurt Chavez: What do I look like?
Mr. Batee: A really tan version of 90's Brad Pitt?
Kurt Chavez: ...Do I look like a fuckin' idiot, Bats? Do you think of me as some kind of moron that you can manipulate? Do I have puppet strings growing out of my arms? You want to see me dance for you?
Mr. Batee: Are you high on crack, Kurt? You gonna come into MY office and insult me?
[Kurt reaches over the desk and grabs Batee by the lips. He motions for the NWA president to please have a seat, then releases his boss from his grip.]
Mr. Batee: YOU MUST BE CRA...
Kurt Chavez: Shut up. I don't want to hear your stupid accent or your insane ramblings. You and I are one in the same. Only difference is I love cocaine, you love booze. We are smart people and smart people fix problems right?
Mr. Batee: YOU...
Kurt Chavez: DONT TALK, JUST NOD.
Mr. Batee: ...you outta your damn mind, talkin' to me like that.
Kurt Chavez: I think we came to that conclusion a LONG time ago, Batee. I know what your angle is. You've got this extremely marketable superstar who is fixing to attain a large amount of media attention for his sad...sad story. You spent four months burying me in the annals of the BACW cards, and I let it happen. My bad. I can only blame myself. Thing is, my contract is UP on February 20th.
Mr. Batee: You don't think I don't already know that?
Kurt Chavez: I'm sure you are painfully aware. You see, there won't be another BACW show for Kurt Chavez. I don't know WHAT you were thinking giving me a BACW title shot a week before I am due to head back to LA. That would be your miscue.
Mr. Batee: I know money, Chavez. Championship matches are money. Put TWO championships in one match and... BAM! The fans love it, and I love the fans. You understand logic, right Kurt?
Kurt Chavez: Yeah. I also understand that this isn't JUST a three way match. You don't want me leaving here with BOTH BACW singles titles. I'm sure you have a sniper up in the rafters with a horse tranquilizer...
Mr. Batee: Nah, you'd enjoy that too much...junkie.
Kurt Chavez: Tru dat. Regardless, when I toss Gaetan out of the ring and hit Barnes with the Shockwave and pin his shoulders to the mat for the 1...2...3, I will take that BACW Championship and you will not see it for at least a month. I'll bring it back to Grinder... but it might have a few modifications.
Mr. Batee: ...why are you telling me this?
Kurt Chavez: It feels really good to tell you things that make you squirm. I know you are holding back the rage. I see the fire in your eyes right now, you piece of shit. It's burning you up. So I hope to see you ringside when the Main Event comes, I hope you get in the ring. I hope you try to get at me, bro, cause I will knock you the fuck out.
[Chavez gets in really close, almost nose to nose. He smirks, then turns around and walks out. Fuming, Batee pulls out a jar of whiskey and pours a glass. After taking a few sips, he lovingly comments.]
Mr. Batee: I love you liquor! You the only person in my life that ain't ever gonna stab me in the back...ingrates.
[Batee straightens out his jacket...]
Mr. Batee: Well then Mr. Chavez, guess I you leave me no choice...
WOOOSH!
Play promo package
B!
[Music riff]
A! [Echo]
[Music riff]
C! [Echo]
[Music riff]
W-!
[Music riff]
[Cue in video clip and ignite pyrotechnics.]
[BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!]
Paul Prominski: Hello everyone and welcome to BACW's February pay per view, welcome to Fully Uncensored! I'm your Host for the evening Paul Prominski aka "The Promo Machine" and every seat in Madison Square Garden has been fill! As you must all know by now, Jack Kraven has successfully defended his NWA World Heavyweight championship at Wrestle Classic by defeating the Legendary Rick Ulfric! But before I talk about that and the main event for the evening, let me introduce to you the man who came up with the phrase "ATM" the ever anal "Easy E" Eric Danger!
E.D: Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! It's me it's me, it's the B.M.O.C! What up Paul?!!!!
Promo: Hey! You just stole Mr. Batee's tag line.
E.D: The card says uncensored and I'm going to make sure we live up to our billing.
Promo: I swear to God if you pull it out, we are going to have issues.
E.D: Only if I have to pee.
[Shuffles papers with a whatever look on his face.]
Promo: It's a jam packed show tonight but tell me Eric, what do you think of this main event?
E.D: First of all Kurt Chavez is like a tampon that's used on the first day of a woman's period...
Promo: Do I dare ask why?
E.D: He's full of blood but all of its bad! In fact, after saying what he just said to Mr. Batee at the opening of our show, I wouldn't be surprised if he walks out of here without any titles around his waist.
Promo: Okay, so in your opinion Kurt leaves BACW without any gold but what about Michael Barnes?
E.D: You know, I'm a big Mike Barnes fans and I find it absolutely hysterical that no matter who holds the Heavyweight strap, that person is considered to be kissing Batee's ass?
Promo: Well...
E.D: Well nothing Paul! I'm tired of these guys in the back saying the same thing over and over and over again and until someone can actually challenge Barnes from another angle, I have a feeling that heavyweight belt isn't going anywhere.
Promo: But what about LaValle?
E.D: What about him?
Promo: Where does he fit into this match?
E.D: He's French! Nuff said!
Promo: I can't say I agree with that but whatever... Folks, before we go into the ring for our opening bout, let's go to the video tape and show you footage Giani Di Luca when he first arrived in the building.
WOOOSH!
[Backstage, Giani is seen with his camera crew, arriving to Madison Square Garden with his seven housemates following behind him. Each one of them looks excited, except Giani, who is more focused on his upcoming match. They walk down the halls, and Louie smacks his shoulder playfully.]
Louie: Yo, Johnny. Why are you lookin' so down, bro. It's a Pay-Per-View, and you gots a big match comin' up soon. You should be crazy excited right now, dawg.
[Giani nods his head, understanding his friend's point of view, but instead, he seems more focused on the task at hand than anything else.]
Giani: Right, but I got too much on my mind right now. I got thousands of fans watchin' me live, and it's only my second pro match. Plus, after my debut, with all the bullshit surroundin' it, I'm just not feelin' the excitement much right now.
[They turn the corner to the locker room area, and Giani enters, setting his bag down on the floor. The group follows him, looking around at it.]
Ricky: Yo, no way! I'm in a real locker room. This shit's crazy, for real.
[The girls sniff the air, smelling the "man" in the room, and they opt to go back into the hallway. The rest of the guys run around, checking everything out like little kids in a toy store. Giani unzips his bag, and pulls out his ring gear, setting it on the nearby bench. He pulls out a towel, and wraps it around his neck.]
Giani: Look, I just don't know. I gotta go out there tonight, and prove all over again that I ain't just some Shore kid tryin' to get ratings for our show. It's like the exact opposite. I'm tryin' to get ratings for this company by being the best damn wrestler I can be. Even if I don't win tonight, I gotta go out there and prove that I'm worth the hype. And if I do win, I hope it ain't like last week, yaknowhatimsayin'?
Tony: I know what you're sayin', dawg. What you need to do is like get friendly with some fellow wrestlers around here. Ya know, someone to have ya back.
Giani: Oh, right. I'm like the new kid on the block, and I got a lot to prove. No one is gonna have my back when they haven't even seen what I can do. That's like… goin' into Karma with a blindfold and trustin' that the chick's not a grenade. Hahaha!
[The guys laugh about it, but Louie shrugs his shoulders.]
Louie: You never know though. Last week, you was on fire, dawg. Shinin' bright. You was a beast. A lotta people would be lucky to have you on their side around here. I know when we run into problems at the clubs, I'm glad you's on our side!
Ricky: Amen brother!
[Giani shrugs his shoulders as he grabs his ring gear and heads back to the shower area.]
Giani: Maybe so. I just figure it'll happen when it happens. For now, I got Jason Phoenix on my mind.
WOOOSH!
#1 Contender: Empire State Championship
Promo: And there you have it! Let's go to the ring for our opening introduction with ring announcer Michael Stuffher.
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Ring Announcer Michael Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to BACW's Fully Uncensored!
Crowd: [POP!]
Promo: It's time for our first match up, between two newer additions to the BACW roster, where a shot at the Empire State title will be on the line.
Stuffher: Our opening match of the evening is scheduled for one fall and will be for the number one contendership for the Empire State championship. Already in the ring, he is "The Living Legend" JJJASSSOOONNNNN PHOENIXXX!!!
[Phoenix struts about the ring, posing for the crowd as they boo and hiss at him.]
E.D.: No love for Phoenix here tonight.
Promo: And with good reason! Anyone who thinks of himself as a king among men is usually going to cause envy among the plebeians, and that's just the case tonight.
E.D.: Did you really just say "plebeians"?
Promo: I did, and I'm proud to say "Long Live King Phoenix". I mean look at the guy. He's pretty buff, he's got a hot queen in the back waiting to rub his shoulders…
E.D.: Okay, that's enough. You're making me sick.
Stuffher: And his opponent…
[A few cameras file through the curtains. "Party Rock Anthem" plays as Giani parts the curtains.]
Stuffher: …standing at 6'5'', and weighing into tonight at 285 lbs. Hailing from Reality Television, USA….he is "The Italian Stallion"…GIANI….DE….LLLLLLLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!
[As Giani comes down to the ring, he supplies his own blast of pyros that rain down on him. He pauses on the ramp as cheers of the audience explode nearly as loud as his pyros. Riling up the crowd up, he fist pumps and jogs down to the ring. He jumps onto the ring apron and soaks in the audience reaction before climbing under the top rope. He bounces from the ropes, then runs over to the far turnbuckle and raises his fist high in the air for his camera crew.]
Promo: Too much showboating by De Luca there.
E.D: And Phoenix proves that! The bell hasn't even rung yet, and he hits Giani with a low blow! This Phoenix guy is nuts!
Promo: Giani falls to the ring, cradling his Italian Sausage!
E.D: That's just wrong.
[The ref calls for the bell to start, and shouts at Phoenix to knock off the unsportsman like conduct.]
Promo: Phoenix getting an earful as he picks up De Luca, angling him into a sidewalk slam.
E.D: Phoenix going for the early cover.
Referee: 1… 2…
Promo: No! Kick out by Giani!
E.D: No way the "Italian Stallion" will give up that easily. This guy's a beast.
Promo: A beast with nipple rings, but a beast nonetheless. In fact, did you catch what he asked Phoenix to do?
E.D: German Suplex! He asked him to put him in the hospital if he couldn't win this match. Another German!
[De Luca looks to be in bad shape after the combination of moves, but the glazed look in his eyes doesn't stay there for long.]
Promo: Looks like the ref is asking Giani if he wants to continue.
["The Italian Stallion" shakes his head no to distract the referee as we see from behind Jason Phoenix, a tanned leg kick into the crotch of Phoenix.]
Promo: Did you see that! That's cheating!
E.D: An eye for an eye, Paul!
Promo: More like a nut for a nut, if you ask me.
E.D: Phoenix recoils a bit from Giani, which gives him an opening!
[It does indeed, as Giani swoops out from Phoenix's arms, and under his legs into a perfect firemen's carry.]
Promo: Phoenix on the shoulders of De Luca, raising him up, extending his body all the way up in a military press….SLAM!
E.D: Phoenix's baldhead just bounced off the canvas, and it looks like he's seeing stars. He's kicking his feet up in pain and rubbing his face.
Promo: Giani pulling up Phoenix again, and this time he's behind! He lifts him up, and there it is!
[Giani fist pumps from behind as he sets him up for the Jersey Turnpike. The audience cheers him on, but as soon as Giani grabs Jason's arm, he swings back with a hard elbow to Giani's head. As Giani stumbles backward, Phoenix goes for a kick to the gut, but Giani grabs onto his leg, and uses it to spin him around. As he does, he sets up for the Jersey Turnpike once again. This time, without the showboating, he is quick to lift Phoenix off the ground, but he comes right back down, taking Giani down in the process. He lays in a few boots for good measure. He quickly climbs the nearest turnbuckle, signaling for the Phoenix Eclipse. He watches Giani lay there, and then he catapults himself off with his finishing maneuver, only to have Giani rolls out of the way at the last possible second.]
Crowd: HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!
The referee checks on both men, and begins a count.
Referee: 1… 2… 3…
[Giani stirs, slowly sitting up, only to roll over on his hands and knees. Phoenix blinks as he tries to shake out the cobwebs. Giani gets up to one knee, steadying himself. He groggily fist pumps, drawing the cheers from the crowd to give him more energy. He crawls over to the turnbuckle, and slowly pulls himself up as the ref continues his count.]
Referee: 6… 7…
[Giani stomps his foot to get Phoenix's attention. As Phoenix slowly starts to get up. Giani begins to jog back and forth, readying himself for his Shufflin' jab combo. He punches forward as he approaches Phoenix, getting him with a right jab, then a left. He lifts his right arm in the air, fist pumping before he connects with the final blow, a right down the middle, straight to Phoenix's forehead.]
E.D: What a combination!
Promo: Phoenix is reeling, and escapes out of the ring.
[Trying to catch his breath, Phoenix moves a bit further from the ring. "The Italian Stallion" taunts him]
Promo: "The Living Legend" is making a run for it! King Phoenix don't run! Punish the usurper!
[The referee begins a ten count, when suddenly, the theme music for The Dark Alley begins playing.]
E.D: What's this? Why're Kimo Newton and Carlos Ortiz out here?
Promo: I don't know, but Phoenix doesn't look excited that they're here!
[Both members of The Dark Alley are carrying steel chairs, with sick grins on their faces.]
Promo: De Luca isn't smiling about their presence either! Are they here to send a message to these two?
[Phoenix looks back at the ring where De Luca stands, ready to fight, and forward where the Dark Alley thugs wait for him with steel folding chairs at the ready.]
Promo: Time to make a choice, King Phoenix! It's do or die in what has turned into a colossal shit storm for Phoenix.
[The bell rings loudly, DING DING DING.]
E.D: What just happened?
Promo: I don't believe it!
Stuffher: Your winner, as a result of a coun tout, and the #1 contender for the Empire State Championship at BACW's Pay-Per-View Grinder….. "THE ITALIAN STALLION"…. GIANIII…..DE….LUUUCAAA!!!
Promo: "The Living Legend" has been screwed! Screwed by the Dark Alley! Why'd those thugs interfere?
E.D: Who knows, but the damage has been done, and Giani de Luca will be challenging the winner of the main event's first pin fall.
[Giani celebrates in the ring, regardless of how he won, rising up to the turnbuckle and fist pumping his victory to the crowd.]
Promo: Phoenix can't believe it and folks, I never thought this would be the case but Giani Di Luca is now the number one contender for the Empire State championship!
E.D: "The Italian Stallion" is starting a streak. He's two and oh in BACW, let's see if he can keep this up!
Promo: Folks, we have to take a break but when we return it will be the tag team titles on the line when The Logan Boys take on The Dark Alley Thugs! We'll see you in a few.
WOOOSH!
Turtle Soup
"Where we going?" Lash asked his older brother as they headed down the hall.
"Imma stop in at Kimo and Carlos' dressing room, you go on to Bat's office, I'll catch up with you." Jace told him.
"Okay" Lash said, and ambled on down the hall. As usual he was carrying something, this time though, it was in a box, so we couldn't see. At least not until he stopped at Mr. Batee's door only to find it was locked. That was okay though, because when he was little lash had loved to get into many, many things, so his dad had taken to locking him out of them. And lash, being the ever inquisitive child, had then taught him to pick locks, so that he could get into them anyway. It was how he had that six in scar on his left shoulder, from getting into the locked gun cabinet and pulling out his uncle's bow. Fortunately, the arrow he'd accidently shot himself with hit his shoulder and not his head, or Batee might not be getting the gift he was about to get.
[Cause the door popped open.]
[And Lash stepped in with a grin. He put the box on the desk and then put on a pair of heavy gloves, before reaching in and carefully removing the three snapping turtles he had inside, each one, like the other pets that had come before them, was adorned with a bow around it's neck, and each one, hanging from that bow, had a little name tag, with its name crudely printed upon it.]
Snap
Crackle
And Pop
Yup. He's named the turtles after the Rice Crispies.
[With affectionate little pats on each of their shells, he left the snapping, hissing vicious little things parked on all the papers, the phone, and the laptop sitting there, where one of them promptly took a piss.]
[As usual, there was also a note, this one left on Batee's chair.]
"I no steal your booze Mr. Bat's, I no steal nothing when I come in here. I just come give gifts, hope you like these."
[It was signed, in his crude scrawl.]
"Lash"
[When he left, he was even so kind as to lock the door behind him.]
[Now down the hall a different kind of gift was being left behind. As Jace slipped into Kimo and Carlos' locker room, unzipped both their bags and poured from the bag he was carrying, a pile of fire ants into each one of their gear and clothing.]
[With a chuckle, he slipped away, looking forward to seeing their entrance to the ring.]
[Later]
"Hey Uncle Azzy"
"Hey kid" Az responded. He was sitting on a bench, fully clothed as he wasn't wrestling, eating from an odd shaped bowl with a spoon that looked less like a spoon and more like a beak.
"What ya eating?" Lash asked him.
"Ya want some?" Az asked with a grin, going to pass it over.
[It looked kind of chunky, and upon closer inspection, the bowl looked less like a bowl and more like the shell of a turtle.]
[Lash cocked his head to the side, studied the bowl as Az pressed it into his hands, sniffed and then his eyes went wide.]
"YOU ATE HIM! YOU EAT MY PRESENT FOR MR. BATS HOW YOU GET!!" Lash yelled, turning the steaming the steaming hot soup upside down on Az's head and to follow it up, smashing his uncle with the turtle shell over and over until Az was a bleeding mess.
"Whoa, whoa, holy shit, Lash stop!" Jace said, grabbing his brother and yanking him away.
"He eat my turtle, he eat my gift to Mr. Batee!" Lash yelled, kicking his uncle in the ribs.
"it's a fucking joke dayum!" Az bellowed from where he lay, spitting out turtle soup and blood. "it wasn't even you're god damned turtle ya fucking loony! I got it from the fucking swamp ‘cause I saw you bring the other's in!"
[Lash scowled, glaring down at him.]
"Not my turtle?" he asked.
"NO!" Az yelled back, sitting up and grimacing.
[Lash's eyes narrowed and he drew his foot back and kicked his uncle hard.]
"You no funny!" Lash told him, and pulling away from his brother, stalked out of the room.
[Jace about lost it then, doubling over with laughter.]
"What the hell are you laughing at?" Az growled.
"He kicked your ass with a turtle shell!" Jace said chuckling as he turned to go. "Now that was funny as hell!"
WOOOSH!
Announcer's Table
Promo: Welcome back from the break! And before we...
[Coming up on the video-tron all that you see is the National Wrestling Alliance World Heavyweight Tag Team Championship Titles sitting on a wooden table as a male voice is heard.]
E.D: Now why doesn't them being here surprise me?
Male Voice: The BACW is the promotion of NWA champions. The region of success... And while, according to Kurt Chavez, nobody cared about the Wrestle Classic match up except for us we REALLY are hoping that he is wrong.
[The camera zooms out to show the team that defeated The Absolved at the NWA Wrestle Classic Pay Per View recently the ICW's HarKore Warriors. "The HarKore God" Weapon-X & "The Mistress of Justice" Viper as you can see behind them their ICW Heavyweight Tag Team Championship titles as well as their separate singles championships the ICW Regional title for X & the ICW Hardcore Championship for Viper.]
Viper: We have taped this as our "State of the Division" address. We know some may be thinking we should just shut up & worry about our upcoming first title defense in the ICW. That if we are like Absolved was in holding the titles for 5 months with only 3 title defenses we should feel lucky just to hold the same titles that are legendary in our sport even if the division has gone to sh*t over this last year. That I should of accepted being in the Super J-Cup & my husband should of challenged the Living Legend in Ulfric in a rankings match but, at least for the next few months, we want to focus on the division that has given us so much over the last 17 years.
[Viper still is wearing bandages upon her head due to the minor concussion that Aaron Shephard gave her at the WCCW New Beginnings event that, while it hasn't been released in public, may of been made worse after the damage that was inflicted upon her at the Wrestle Classic Event.]
Weapon-X: Jace and Lashiel Logan. The BACW Heavyweight Tag Team Champions The Logan Boys. You two have held the championship titles since November 15th's BACW TVMA show where you two defeated Miami's Most Wanted in a Steel Cage contest. After that match they beat the living hell out of the two of you & stole the championship titles as while it's clear those titles were returned & that team is gone you two may lose tonight in your rematch vs. The Dark Alley Thugs. This time it's not a mystery team this time you could prepare & we listened to your last promo where you are 100 % right Jace you cannot honor. You can't steal heart as for what the two of you have done in the BACW we respect the two of you. It's not enough though I hope that you know that.
[Weapon-X has a black "ICW Rampage" t-shirt covering his gut but you can see ripples underneath it that you can tell he's still not 100% from the internal injuries of the last week & a half at the hands of The Absolved.]
Viper: Your team is now number 1 in the NWA tag team rankings but your team hasn't made a PEEP in the Alliance at all since November. Now before you two won the BACW tag team titles it's smart to win your regional belts first but now as if the two of you come out successful tonight how many times are you two going to beat The Dark Alley Thugs before the BACW staff hires another tag team? I understand being "big fish in a small pond" & the joy it must give to the two of you as it's done the same for us in the ICW & for the ICW fans BUT we think you're a great team. Your team COULD stack up along with the greats in the NWA like The Hunters, John Riker & Anthony Vanin & The Black Knights of Michael Cavenaugh & Jason Dredd but we'll never know if the two of you trap yourselves in this small pond. Hell by themselves they are Legends, Hall of Famers in WWA, NWA & Professional Wrestling as a whole but EVEN Ulfric & Michael Lennox who formed The Dark Angels only lasted around 3 months as champions to find great TEAMS are what we are looking for. And after defeated NWA's Top Team of 2011 in Absolved other then what we guess will be a March rematch we come to the TOP promotion currently in the NWA to look for another challenge.
Weapon-X: That's right my love as while BACW hosts a Pay Per View in August & has a mandatory shot in September we don't want to wait that long because the tag team division is a failure in all but TWO NWA regions. ICW's tag team division is on life support again as after we demanded competition for two months Crazzy Gerald brought in the Power Trip with it's leader being Jason Phoenix & the team of Christian Taylor & Mike Smith. They beat us in a 6-Person tag team match but when the titles were on the line we successfully retained as now there are rumors their "taking their ball & leaving" the ICW. WCCW's tag division is DEAD with New Tradion & The Darkstar Brothers retired as with the events of Wrestle Classic we'll see the status of their regional tag team champions Absolved. Another rumor is that the new U.K. division Premiere may not even HAVE a tag team division when their region gets it's first NWA World tag team title shot as of course BACW we've already stated only has TWO active tag teams. The only two regions in the NWA with ANY hope are SCW & RMP with depth as we'll see in the upcoming weeks the talent in those places if it matches the depth as I know this is long winded but what we're saying is WE want to give YOU the opportunity to make a name for yourselves because of your ranking of first in this months rankings.
[X smiles as he finally gets to his point upon which his lovely but deadly wife Viper picks up on where he's going.]
Viper: This has not been cleared by the NWA Owner Mr. Batee or it's Board of directors BUT we want to shock the system including them as if they decline us the lawyers will get involved. Now in the ICW we have our first defense so we COULD lose but if we're still champions AND in March's rankings as long as the Logan Boy's are still in either 1st or 2nd we are here by challenging YOUR TEAM to a NON-TITLE match to take place in the month or March. Now if your ranked 3rd you have the first part of March to try to get back in 2nd but as to "where" this match takes place that is up to you be it BACW, ICW or a neutral promotion. The stipulations to the actual match are up to you as well BUT for the winner here are our rules. IF The Logan Boy's win then be it early enough in March you two will get to be INCLUDED in whatever the WCCW region has in mind for us for our second title defense. IF the WCCW match is already finalized then in April, since it's Premiere's Month & they may not even have a division, it'd be guaranteed to happen there. The lawyers & staff people will work out the exacts as HELL if Premiere does have a division or if either their staff or the WCCW staff say's now we promise RIGHT HERE to defend our titles twice in the month of April as it'll take place at, which is fitting IF this event is going to be what we believe it will, 2012's NWA Crockett Cup even IF it means we'll have to be double booked to compete in the tournament.
Weapon-X: And you may be thinking "what happens when The HarKore Warriors win?" well it's fairly simple as no we're not greedy so we're not looking for a shot at the BACW Heavyweight Tag Team Championship titles or to get me a shot at the NWA Hardcore Championship as we are doing this, while I won't lie a bit for the Ego boost for the almost two decades worth of being urinated on by "all-time" rankings like Roughkuts, but 90% for the betterment of the NWA's tag team division. So nothing that serious as when we win The Logan Boy's will move down TWO spots on the March Rankings as we want this SO much we're not even looking for any massive money winnings or earning anything else other then what should be a temporary disadvantage for you two as what do you say do we have a deal?
Viper: Let's prove to the world how great the tag division can be as while we'll never disrespect the NWA Heavyweight Championship of the WORLD or the legendary holder of it in Jack Kraven we DEMAND to have matches that are at least close to that in its importance. These belts have been active since 1998 & with a name such as the NWA that has over a HUNDRED years of history as if it is for three more weeks or 11 months that we are champions our word to the fans as well as to the National Wrestling Alliance as a whole is that f*ck people like Kurt Chavez who believe this division is pointless we are going to FORCE you to bring the division back to what it deserves. And as for The Dark Alley Thugs or any other team that is secretly about to form in the BACW currently The Aristocrat's of the SCW is ranked number 10. If any of you that aren't ranked, while a team LIKE Miami's Most Wanted that has been gone since November OR teams like E & R from ICW or Evolution's Angels from RMP have been inactive for OVER a month but are still ranked, should be banging on the doors of Mr. Batee's office to get to challenge The Aristocrat's for that rank. And then when you win go after the 9th ranked Harvard Connection OR if Miami's Most Wanted is still barred get them stricken from the rankings I know that many of you believe us to be annoying. Believe us to be "high & mighty" or many of you evil doers like Jason Phoenix just hate us for telling the truth. You can't do a damn thing about it unless you are in the rankings.
Weapon-X: In closing I hope you all are going to watch ICW's Shattered Innocence Pay per View to see our first of many successful NWA World Heavyweight Tag Team Championship Title defenses. If March comes & goes with NOBODY accepting our want to raise the bar in this division then I guess either in March or in April I'll get to start to mark off 1 of only a few things left on my career bucket list which is to start the rise in the NWA World Heavyweight Championship division. Til then Logan Boy's we'll be awaiting your reply.
[The HarKore Warriors, who've held over 20 tag team championships together in over 17 years with Weapon-X almost 30 if you count with other partners such as the WWA World Heavyweight Tag Team Championship Title reign with RJ Harris, fade from view...]
WOOOSH!
Promo: Those guys are extreme jerks!
E.D: No, I just think they are extremely confident in what they are saying.
Promo: Yeah but...
E.D: Don't yeah but me Paul! Look, when The Absolved had the belts for almost one year when did they ever step into BACW or show interest in our tag division?
Promo: Well...
E.D: Precisely! So stop giving The HarKore Warriors a hard time and move onto the next match.
Promo: Let's go to the ring?
E.D: Why don't we...
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: Our first championship bout is scheduled for one fall with no time limit. Already in the ring, they are Kimo Newton and Carlos Ortiz! The Dark Alley Thugs!!!
Crowd: BOO!
Promo: Do you smell that?
[Putting his hands into the crack of his ass and then to his face...]
E.D: Now I do! YUCK!!
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: And their opponents, entering the ring...
Crowd: [POP!]
Stuffher: They are the team of Lashiel and Jace – The Logan Boys!!!
Crowd: [Continued POP!]
Referee: Alright who's starting out for who?
E.D: Looks like we are just going to jump right into this one.
BACW Tag Team Championship
The Logans © Vs. The Dark Alley Thugs
Promo: Apparently we are starting off with Kimo Newton and well, Lash and Jace can't figure out who is going to start.
Lash: You sure you no eat Mister Batty present?
Jace: I told you Five Hundred times already! It was a joke!
[In the opposite corner Newton is becoming a bit agitated by the Logan's antics.]
E.D: Well they better figure it out fast.
[Jace gets the nod and Lash tags himself in.]
Lash: ME FIRST!
Crowd: [POP!] LASH! LASH! LASH!
[Lash pumps up the crowd and over his shoulder Jace tags himself back in.]
Crowd: [BOO!]
E.D: How a team like this ever got hold of the tag team championship is beyond me.
Promo: Sometimes it's about the chemistry but clearly Kimo has had enough and here he comes!
[Racing across the logo, it's Kimo with strikes to Jace in the corner but Logan fights back with kicks of his own.]
Promo: Irish whip into the ropes!
[On the rebound, Jace leaps upwards with a Lou Thesz Press and then an elbow drop to the chest.]
Referee: TAG!
Promo: Tag to Lashiel who drops the sledgehammer.
E.D: He missed and Kimo catches him with a huge spinning elbow and crawling to his corner, Newton finally tags in Carlos Ortiz.
Crowd: [BOO!]
[Getting his freak on, Carlos delivers a series of arm drags on Lash.]
Promo: Lashiel better tag out before it's too late.
E.D: Lash tries to counter with a springboard kick to Carlos but Ortiz tags in Jace by mistake.
Promo: Are you as confused as the referee right now?
E.D: I have no idea who's in... Man this was a bad day to quit sniffing glue.
[On the outside, Carlos flips back catching Jace's head in his feet and this allows Kimo to get in a cheap kick to the head. Back in the ring, Kimo gets the legal tag and begins choking Jace with his boot.]
E.D: Reversal!
Crowd: [BOO!]
Promo: Kimo with a sleeper on Jace and this brings action to a halt.
E.D: He better squeeze harder!!!
[Jace fights back to his feet and it's Carlos with a cheap shot on Lash that leads to a nasty double team.]
E.D: Jace with a reverse neck breaker on Kimo!
Crowd: NO!
Referee: TAG!
Promo: Hot tag to Lash who levels both members of The Dark Alley Thugs!
[Carlos takes a belly-to-belly from Lash but Kimo lands a face plant on Lash!]
E.D: Springboard flip to Jace on the outside.
Crowd: OH!!!!
Promo: Carlos levels Lash and we have a press!
Referee: ONE! TWO!! THRE!!!
Crowd: THREE!!!
Promo: Carlos gets a close two count inside the ring and this one's going to continue.
[Carlos hoists Lash onto his shoulders, as Kimo goes up to the top turnbuckle.]
Promo: They need to watch Jace!!!
[From the apron, Jace trips him up, hits the Stunner on Carlos and Lash hits a German suplex into a reverse neck breaker!!!]
Crowd: [POP!!!!!]
Promo: Lash hooks the leg for the win!
Referee: ONE! TWO!!
Crowd: THREE!!!
E.D: You have to be kidding me... The retard won again!?
Promo: The proper way to say it is... Lashiel with the pin fall and the champions retain!!
E.D: Whatever!
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: Your winners and STILL BACW Tag Team champions, Jace and Lashiel – The Logan Boys!
Crowd: [POP!]
Promo: What a match and folks the Dark Alley Thugs can't believe what just happened.
[Inside the ring the two losers argue over who lost the match as we fade into the back where xZone Reporter Candice Hoffman is trying to track down our NWA World Hardcore champion Kai Kennedy.]
WOOOSH!
Interview with Candice Hoffman: Kai Kennedy
Candice Hoffman: Hello fanboys and fangirls! I'm your sexy on the scene xZone Report Candice Hoffman, and right now I'm standing outside the door of "That F'ing Guy" Kai Kennedy. Lots of speculation has been circling about the stability of the two-man group Genesis, comprised of World Champ Jack Kraven and Kai Kennedy. Tonight, I'm hoping to get to the bottom of this issue, and see if Kraven and Kennedy are going to be keeping the group together or if they may be splitting ways here.
[She knocks on the door of the locker room, and we hear the voice of Kennedy respond.]
Kennedy: Damn it, Jack! I told you for the thirteenth time, I'm sorry! I was barred from entering without a ticket at Wrestle Classic. I wasn't booked, so Batee told security I wasn't allowed in without buying a ticket! What do you want from me?
[The locker room door swings open wildly, with a visibly upset Kennedy looking around angrily for the World Champ. His scowl turns from fierce to mild when he sees that it isn't Kraven but Hoffman. Caught off-guard, but not completely stunned, he looks at the camera then back to Hoffman.]
Kennedy: What is it, Candice? I told you I'd be ready to interview in ten minutes.
Candice: I know, but I've still got to catch up some more superstars, and they wanted me to ask a little more about what's going on with you and Jack Kraven.
Kennedy: Jesus, Candice. You could have let me know before you started rolling. Alright, get in here, I guess.
Candice: So, you. Jack Kraven. Genesis. A new baby girl born during Wrestle Classic. Thoughts?
Kennedy: Quick to the kill aren't you? Fine, whatever... As you no doubt heard, I was barred from NWA's Wrestle Classic by personal order of Batee according to security. He was afraid I'd interfere in the Main Event between Jack and Ulfric. Ridiculous, I know, considering that I'd have been able to keep Chavez from doing JUST THAT. I've already explained to Jack about the different NWA companies trying to keep me from being a factor in Jack's title defenses, and it seems like it's working. That ends at his next title defense. I will be there, and I will keep outside sources from making Jack look bad in the ring. Genesis is here, and I won't let Jack down again.
Candice: And his new little girl?
Kennedy: To tell you the truth, I can't stand children. Does it matter when it comes to Jack's kid? I'm not sure.
Candice: Why?
Kennedy: It'll depend on how long I can stay on good terms with Jack.
Candice: Good…terms?
Kennedy: I've been a Black Knight before. Twice. Both times ended badly. This may not be another Knighthood, but the overall threat remains apparent to both Jack and myself. If the relationship goes sour, let's just say that I need to make sure I don't end up with another shard of glass in my back. Genesis was a rebirth for me. I don't think that I've landed myself a good name though.
Candice: You mean "That F'ing—"
Kennedy: Right. I mean, how seriously can you take a guy with the F-bomb in his moniker? Do you think someone's going to take a second look at someone like that? When you look at me, do you see someone that is a real threat? Or do you see someone that the crowd laughs at? A month ago, I drove down to the ring in a pink car.
Candice: That was fun!
Kennedy: But that's the point…it was fun. It didn't help me keep my title against Chris Ross. Pandering to the fans for cheap laughs, be it with a pink car and Jersey Shore douche outfit, or riding a miniature horse to frustrate Batee…what's the point?
Candice: Isn't part of the whole wrestling gig to entertain the fans?
Kennedy: It is, but not that way. The way to keep the fans entertained isn't through cheap thrills and stupid monikers. The way to keep a fan in awe of you, to excite them, and make them look at you in a serious light…is to become monstrous.
Candice: So you're looking at becoming a monster?
Kennedy: Not like you may think. You see, many of the twenty to thirty year olds in the crowd remember the 1997 for a wonderfully horrific reason. In 1997, video game developer Square Enix released a hit PlayStation game, with one of the most jaw dropping creatures to ever impact the media.
Candice: What creature?
Kennedy: …Sephiroth, from Final Fantasy VII. A man genetically altered from before birth, destined to be a walking genocide. As I've previously released with my medical history, originally, my father genetically engineered me from before birth as well. I was the first successful experiment of a Cuban facility. You could say I've been strongly influenced by Sephiroth…a spiritual kinmanship, possibly. And so, I will be dropping my "That F'ing Guy" moniker, and taking up the mantle that would do him and my father proud.
Candice: And what is that?
Kennedy: I want to address Chris Ross first.
[Kennedy looks at the camera...]
Kennedy: Ross, I don't know what's wrong with your head. Having been admitted to a psych ward before, I know that being certifiably insane isn't a condition that people want to deal with, friend, family, or enemy. That's why I'm the only one who can see into your soul. I'm the only one who can stop this madness before it begins. I am the dark that will force the light out of you. Tonight, at Fully Uncensored, the "One Winged Angel" will stop "Cancerous" Chris Ross from spreading to the rest of the NWA; because I AM…BETTER…THAN…YOU!!
Candice: I'm your sexy on the scene xZone reporter Candice Hoffman saying, if you can't drop the "F" then you don't belong on my show, back to you Promo!
WOOOSH!
Announcer's Table
Promo: Thank you very much Candice Hoffman our roving xZone reporter! Think there's trouble in paradise?
E.D: My thinking is that Kai Kennedy doesn't want to end up as Jack Kraven's lackey and mark my words, he's looking to push the eject button.
Promo: Be that as it may, it's time to go to the ring!
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
NWA World Hardcore Championship
Chris Ross © vs. Kai Kennedy
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is for the National Wrestling Alliance's World…HARDCORE…CHAMPIONSHIIIIIIIIIPPPP!!! Introducing the challenger for the title, he stands at 6'5'' tall, he is the "One Winged Angel" and "That F'ing Guy"…KAI...KKKKKEEEENNNNEEEEEDDDDDDYYYYYY!!!
Crowd: [POP!]
[The metal cover of "One Winged Angel" by The Black Mages blasts through the audience as Kai Kennedy rips through the BACW curtain. He hurtles down the aisle in a pair of flexible wrestling jeans, with size 16 wrestling boots on his massive feet.]
Promo: Love or hate the guy, he just doesn't seem to care. He's in this arena tonight for one purpose and one alone.
E.D.: He wants that title belt, and he's sure he's going to beat "Cancerous" Chris Ross tonight.
Promo: [staring at E.D.] Don't ever say that again.
E.D.: What'd I say?
Promo: Never mind. But folks, Kennedy's been on a vendetta since coming here. At his debut in BACW, he won the NWA Hardcore Championship, which I don't think has ever been done before in the history of the championship.
E.D.: Nope, but then again, he lost the title in his first defense just one month later at 2012 Ways to Bleed. I'd say that Ross has had a more successful run that Kai has by another twelve days.
Promo: Except that Ross hasn't had a defense yet, so we'll see if Kennedy and Ross trade this championship back and forth, or if one can show the dominance going forward.
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: And his opponent... Come down the isle... I mean sprinting down the isle... I mean... HOLY SHIT I'M GETTING OUT OF HERE!!!!!
Promo: Ross steps over the top rope, circles the ring, immediately locks up, and Kennedy gets a side headlock applied off the collar tie, but Ross whips him off like a feather weight.
[Kennedy takes him down with a cut block before going back into the ropes but Ross kicks him and sends him back peddling. Punching himself in the face, Ross lowers his head like a rhino but eats a kick to the teeth.]
Chris Ross: UGH!
E.D: So why are these two wrestlers trying to kill each other again?
Promo: Short history between Kennedy and Ross, is that there's no love lost between them. Kennedy won the title after it was vacated by Kraven, beat Azrael, lost it to Ross and now Kennedy is getting his rematch against Ross after beating him in the Survivor Series tag match.
[Inside the ring, Kennedy clotheslines him over the top rope and Ross bounces off the apron. Reach over with his fist, Kennedy uppercuts Chris and he sends the big man into another haymaker. Ross reaches over, grabs Kennedy by the head, and pulls him onto the ring apron, and he begins beating him down bad.]
E.D: Is Kai Hulking up?
Promo: I hope not...
E.D: LOOK OUT!
[Kennedy blocks the seventh punch, and bounces Ross off the apron and into the announcer's table.]
E.D: Hey that's my drink!!!
[Kennedy grabs Eric Danger's drink and smashes Ross right in the face.]
CRAaACK!
[The liquid goes everywhere and smelling his hands Paul asks...]
Promo: Is that whiskey?
E.D: Yes, I mean - NO!!!!
[Kennedy puts an open steel chair around Ross' neck, laughs like a maniac, and throws Ross into the steel steps with a CLANG!]
Crowd: [OH!]
Promo: Kennedy poses, and picks Ross up.
[Looking into the sea of extreme, Kennedy looks goes back to the well but this time Ross reverses a whip and suplexes Kennedy on the ground!]
[SPLAT!]
Promo: What is this nut job doing?
E.D: You realize you just said nut job right...
Promo: Shut up!
[Pulling back the skirt of the apron, Chris looks under the ring, and pulls out a barbwire kendo stick. Turning to inflict some pain, Kennedy quickly takes him down, and grabs the stick from Ross. Raising it above his head, Kennedy then smashes Ross on the back with it over and over and over and over again!!]
Whack!!
WHACK!!!
Whack!!
WHACK!!!
Whack!!
WHACK!!!
Whack!!
WHACK!!!
[With blood pouring from his back, Ross tries to stagger away, so Kennedy takes him down by throwing the discarded chair at him.]
Promo: Ross is holding his knee in agony!
E.D: This could be the break Kennedy was waiting for!!
[Kennedy points to the giant ladder on the stage, and dragging Ross up the ramp, throws the champion into it with force. Once again Kennedy poses as the crowd chants his name.]
Crowd: KAI! KAI! KAI!
[Kennedy picks him up, and punches Ross down the ramp until Ross falls into the apron. Feeling Ross is almost done, Kennedy sets Chris up on the apron, and he hits a SICK draping DDT onto the floor! All of a sudden Jason Phoenix runs down to the ring, and he sends Kennedy into the ring post. Jason then kicks him in the face, and he throws him into the ring. Looking over at the bloodies Ross, Jason throws him into the ring too.]
Promo: Ross is going to win?
Referee: One! Two!!
Crowd: THREE!!!
Promo: Kennedy kicks out and this one's going to continue.
[Furious and now out of control, Ross stomps Kennedy in the corner like a bitch who tried to steal money from her pimp and with spit hanging from his mouth, Ross tries to choke him out.]
Promo: STOP THE MATCH!!!
E.D: What the hell? Oh! I get it! It was awesome, holy shit, he's hardcore when Ross is getting his teeth kicked in but when it happens to Kai it's "Stop the match?"
Promo: Well I...
E.D: Sheesh! So much for calling it right down the middle...
[With the action continuing inside the ring, Ross drives some shoulders into his midsection but Kennedy blocks the Irish whip, kicks him, and clotheslines the champ down a pair of times. Kennedy reaches down deep, hits a nice power slam, and he begins to stalk Ross who is now on Queer Street.]
Promo: Kennedy looks to be in control but I guess the only question on my mind is what in the world is Jason Phoenix's beef with these guys?
E.D: I think he's just a squirrel trying to get a nut.
Promo: And speaking of nuts, Ross is STILL down and Kennedy is once again on the move!
[Kennedy stares at Ross's prone body for a moment.]
E.D.: What's he doing?
[Kennedy looks at Ross, then towards the turnbuckle, before turning back to Ross.]
Promo: …no way.
E.D.: He can't be seriously thinking this through.
[Kennedy slips out of the ring, and looks under the ring.]
Promo: What is he looking for under there?
[Kennedy pulls out something shiny, which throws the crowd into frenzy.]
E.D.: Oh… dear… God.
Promo: That's a sheet of glass!
[Kai slides the sheet into the ring, and pushes it towards a corner of the ring. The crowd screams loudly as he sets it up. Kennedy doesn't notice as Ross gets to his feet.]
Promo: We're about to see Kennedy get kicked through that glass!
[Kennedy turns around as Chris Ross launches at him with a Wipe Out finisher.]
Promo: Ross nails Kennedy...
E.D.: NO!!! He dodged it! Kennedy whips Ross onto his shoulders, and there he goes!
[Kennedy whips Ross around his head with a firemen airplane DDT through the glass.]
Promo: That's Kennedy's signature finisher! He's calling that the "Angel's Crusher" now!
[Ross is bleeding out of several different places now, as the crowd is screaming.]
Crowd: YOU'RE HARDCORE!!! YOU'RE HARDCORE!!! YOU'RE HARDCORE!!!
[Kennedy looks to the turnbuckle as Ross crumples to the floor, with multiple shards of glass sticking out of him.]
Crowd: DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!
[Kennedy leaps to the top rope, and points to the sky.]
Kennedy: ANGEL BOMB!!!
Promo: Kennedy leaps!
[Kennedy hits a Swanton Bomb on Chris Ross.]
E.D.: Looks like Kennedy didn't escape unscathed! He got a nasty slash on his back from the glass!
Promo: That won't stop him now though as he goes for the cover!
Referee: ONE! TWO!!
Crowd: THREE!!!
Referee: Ring the bell!
Promo: Kennedy regains the title and rolling from the ring, Chris Ross can't believe it!
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: Your winner of the contest by pin fall and once again NEW NWA World Hardcore champion; Kai Kennedy!!!
Crowd: [POP!]
Promo: Into the ring comes Jack Kraven to celebrate with his friend and security is now dragging a bloody Chris Ross from the ringside area.
Chris Ross: KENNEDY!!! THIS ISN'T OVER!! YOU'RE A DEAD MAN! DEEEEAD MAN WALKING!!! AAAAARRRUGH!!!!!
[Finally handcuffing Chris Ross on the ramp, the local authorities finally get the lunatic under a control before Magnum Randell hits the ring from the crowd and begins to kick the shit out of Jack Kraven with a steel chair.]
I Quit Match!
Jack Kraven Vs. Magnum Randell
Promo: Magnum breaks the steel chair into pieces and Kraven is quivering from the impact.
E.D: Randell told Kraven he would get him back from taking his world championship and I guess he's making good on his word!
Referee: Ring the bell and get Kennedy out of here!!!
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Promo: Forget about the introductions and forget about the formalities! They are fighting down the isle!!! It's Kraven verses Randell and you can only see this in BACW!
E.D: Kraven with a rack to the eyes!
[Stumbling to his feet, Kraven kicks and punches Randell down and motioning to the crowd, gives Madison Square Garden the double middle finger salute.]
Crowd: [BOO!]
[Picking Magnum off the logo, Kraven knees him and then slams him down with a vicious scoop slam.]
[BOOM!]
Promo: Into the corner they go and this isn't looking good for Randell.
E.D: I think it's WAY to early to tell.
[Looking to ugly up his opponent, Magnum grinds his knee into the ribs and tries to pull Kraven out of the corner but Jack holds onto the ropes.]
Promo: Jack says NO!
E.D: Randell says YES!
[With one yank, Kraven sends Magnum into the ropes and bouncing back and fourth, Randell ducks two consecutive clotheslines and then finishes it off with a thudding dropkick to the chest!]
Promo: Magnum applies a triangle choke and he's asking the referee for a submission
Referee: Do you submit?!!
Kraven: NO!!!
E.D: Kraven fights to his feet and Randell is stunned!
Crowd: [BOO!]
[Needing to pick up the pace, Randell tackles Kraven and they both go into the corner after a brief scrap. Jack pins Randell against the turnbuckle but misses his shoulder block!]
Crowd: [YEAH!]
Promo: Randell counters with a kick to the face and goes to the top rope!
E.D: This could spell trouble!
[Kraven quickly runs up and hits a belly-to-belly suplex and as he pauses to argue with the referee for not having the microphone out soon enough, Magnum rolls outside to recover.]
Promo: Kraven will have none of that and following the former champion, he throws him back into the ring.
[Body slam by Kraven and going up to the second rope, Kraven unloads with drop a leg from hell.]
[BOOM!]
Promo: Kraven wants to ask the referee for a submission this time!
Referee: Do you give up?!!
E.D: Magnumm slaps the microphone out of his hands and this one's going to continue!
[Going into his bag of tricks, Jack applies a double chicken-wing submission but Magnum fights up to his feet and pushing backwards, slams Kraven into the turnbuckle breaking the hold. With Jack gasping for breath, Randell goes into the ropes but Jack delivers a low drop kick to the knee.]
Crowd: [OH!]
Promo: Randell limps to his feet…
[Kraven repeats the move and taking a brief pause puts Randell back in the corner and chokes him on the top rope.]
Crowd: [BOO!]
Referee: Break the hold! ONE! TWO! THREE!!!
Promo: Kraven releases the choke in time and Magnum is in serious trouble.
Jack Kraven: ASK HIM!!!!
[The referee leans the microphone towards Randell's mouth and asks...]
Referee: Will you quit?
[Randell's bloodied face smiles and shakes his head.]
Magnum Randell: I QUIT.
[The crowd is shocked and the referee dumb struck, calls for the bell.]
E.D: What the hell?
Promo: I can't believe those words actually came out of Randell's mouth! But look at Randell! He can't believe it either!
[Randell is livid, and back on his feet staring at Kraven. Kraven gives a shrug as neither is sure what just happened.]
E.D: Kraven doesn't have any idea what's going on here.
Magnum Randell: I QUIT. I QUIT. I QUIT. I QUIT. I QUIT. I QUIT. I QUIT. I QUIT.
Promo: What the hell is going on?
[The metal cover of "One Winged Angel" by The Black Mages rips through the audience.]
Promo: It's him!
E.D: It's "That F***ing Guy"!
Promo: But what's he doing out here? Is he here to back up Kraven?
E.D: Back him up? The match is over!
[The music cuts, as we see Kennedy raise a microphone to his mouth.]
Promo: What's he got to say?
E.D: Nothing good, I'm certain.
[Kai opens his mouth, takes a deep breath…and closes his mouth again. Then out of his pocket, he pulls out a small box.]
Promo: What's that? He's putting that box up against the—wait, is that?
Magnum Randell: I QUIT.
E.D: …no f***ing way.
[The look on Randell's face says it all. Jack Kraven is beside himself with laughter in the ring and with him the entire crowd and the ridiculousness.]
Kai Kennedy: What was that again, Randell?
[He places the microphone against the voice recorder again.]
Magnum Randell: I QUIT.
Kai Kennedy: Like music to my ears.
Promo: Inside the ring the referee sees the shenanigans by Kai Kennedy and oh my god! Is he?
E.D: I think he is!
Referee: Reverse the decision!
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner by disqualification by order of the referee – Magnum Randell!!!
Crowd: [POP!]
[Now at the top of the ramp, Kraven begins to yell at Kai...]
Jack Kraven: Why Kai?!! I had it won!!!
[Parting the curtains and arguing all the way into the back, we are just going to have to wait and see what happened some other time as the cameras quickly move back to the announcer's table. Inside the ring, Magnum finishes his celebration as the show continues.]
Promo: Well thanks to Kai Kennedy, Jack Kraven has lost once again to Magnum Randell and you have to wonder if Jack knew anything about that voice box.
E.D: I think Kraven is and always will be clueless without Mike Cavenaugh at his side.
Promo: That simple?
E.D: Like knowing how many strokes it takes to pleasure myself.
Promo: Oooookay! With that said, let's head into the back so that we can get a few words from Gaetan LaValle.
WOOOSH!
As Seen on TV
[Handycam shot. LaValle's out on a busy, crowded city street, along with… a one man band?]
LaValle: Listen, I know we've got a busy schedule, but I had to take five minutes to address something coming out of B.A.C.W. Kurt? We're gonna have to wait for another time, cause something Barnes said just… made my blood boil!
Michael Barnes… I'll be facing you soon enough, but what you said just got me MAD.
[He turns to a gathering crowd around him]
LaValle: It's an injustice! Am I right?
[The crowd around him sort of goes "yeah."]
LaValle: I SAID "AM! I! RIGHT?!"
[The crowd perks up. "Yeah!"]
LaValle: You said even though you're Champ, NOBODY'S GOING TO PROMOTE YOU?! WRONG! I WILL! Take it, Jimmy!
[Jimmy's apparently the "band"'s name. The painted bass drum on his back proclaims him to be "The Real One-Man Show!". He starts playing a bouncy, mid-tempo song, as Gaetan begins singing…]
He beat up on a clown/now says he's unpromoted
He's feeling pretty down/ His P.R. guy's demoted!
MIKE BARNES!
[Bom! Bom!]
Hall Monitor of Badass!
MIKE BARNES!
[Bom! Bom!]
He won't give you a hall-pass!
Barnes is King of All the MMA!
Can't mar-ket himself, anyway-
MIKE BARNES!
[Bom! Bom!Bom! *Cymbals*]
He's scowling all the time/Must have had a charm embargo-
Do check him out, sometime/He fights out of Chicago!
MIKE BARNES!
[Bom! Bom!]
He ran with the Uprising!
MIKE BARNES!
[Bom! Bom!]
Success is unsurprising!
Does he scare you? He sure scares me!
He talks such smack about Batee-
MIKE BARNES!
[Bom! Bom! Bom! *Cymbals*!]
He'll break your arm, he'll twist your leg/ he'll crack you in the skuuull!
Gets no appreciation ‘cause/ he's frankly kind of duuull!
MIKE BARNES!
[Bom! Bom!]
His finisher's "Peace Treaty!"
MIKE BARNES!
[BOM! BOM!]
His victories come, speedy!
Michael Barnes is the champ, y'see,
that knows oshiri from hiji-
MIKE BARNES!
[BOM! BOM! BOM! *Cymbal*]
He sells few shirts, his merch has dust/ he's driving fans awaay-
But why? He knows a key lock/ from a katahajimeee!
MIKE BARNES!
[BOM BOM!]
His matches are a classic!
MIKE BARNES!
[BOM! BOM!]
He's monster! He's Jurassic!
Spits at fans just like a camel-
Bears no resemblance to Mark Hamill,
Mike Barnes.
[Bom-bom! Bom!]
Tangles losers up like yarn…s.
[Bom-bom! Bom!]
Only slightly like…Kim Carnes....
[Bom-bom!Bom!]
…okay, I've got nothing else- Mike BAAAAARNES!
[Jimmy does much of a solo as you can do when you're already a one-man band (and, therefore, already solo). Gaetan wraps it up. Anyway…let's be blunt here. There's a reason we usually don't have wrestlers doing impromptu song-recitals. The crowd, however, grateful for free entertainment, claps nonetheless.]
LaValle: There. Solved half your problem- now you're promoted. I'll take care of the "champ" part… soon.
You're welcome!
[Camera cuts out...]
Main Event
Triple Threat Match
Michael Barnes vs. Kurt Chavez vs. Gaetan LaValle
Promo: I... I... I don't know what to...
E.D: Just don't say anything... Please!
Promo: For once I'm going to agree with you and just say... Fans welcome back and in just a few moments we are going to introduce the men who will be competing in tonight's main event. But I think it's important to highlight that this is, at the same time, Gaetan's first crack at the Empire State Title, his first crack at the BACW Heavyweight Title, the first time he meets Barnes, and (perhaps) the nly time he'll get to meet Kurt Chavez.
This is not a throwaway match for LaValle... In fact, according to him, he plans to come out of this a multiple champion, burning this pay per view into the minds of each and every BACW fan's memory.
E.D: What do you think he should do?
Promo: Gaetan should throw everyone a curve and tear into this match like a man possessed.
E.D: Well said... Normally in this sort of match, I say something like Gaetan hangs back, and takes advantage of whoever's doing badly but not this time.
Promo: Let's go to the ring!
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, the rules of this next bout have changed per Mister Batee.
Crowd: [Groan]
Promo: I wonder what the owner has up his sleeve.
E.D: Probably something that will put Kurt Chavez in his place.
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: This contest is now one fall to a finish for both the BACW and Empire State championships!
Crowd: [POP!]
Promo: I guess the stakes just got a bit higher.
Stuffher: Now in the ring, he is the Empire State champion – Kurt Chavez!
Crowd: [MEGA POP!!!!]
Promo: A bit skinnier but folks when it comes to entertaining the crowd, there's nothing like him on the face of this planet.
E.D: Too bad he won't be here for long.
Promo: That's just not right.
E.D: Neither is a smelly asshole but we all have them.
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
#Zob—i-i-! LA MOUCHE!
Promo: Here comes the reigning NWA World Television champion!
[Gaetan LaValle's music starts playing as he enters the Garden. The crowd goes off BIG time, after his last match.]
Crowd: La-Va-LLE! La-Va-LLE! La-Va-LLE!
[Even two weeks out, it looks like he's been through a war. He's still got the traces of a shiner over one eye.]
Promo: I'm a bit shocked that the champion is carrying the World TV Title belt even though it's not on the line tonight…
E.D: After the shit he had to go through to keep it? If it was me, I'd shower with the damned thing!
Stuffher: Entering the ring, he is the National Wrestling Alliance World Television champion! Ladies and gentlemen – Gaetan LaValle!!!!!
Crowd: [POOOOOP!!!!]
E.D: Fucking French!
[Ignoring the comments Paul continues...]
Promo: I spoke with LaValle about Barnes' comments about ‘becoming American'. He simply said "If we were in Paris, and I tried to make you speak good French, I'd be the Bad Guy. What makes this different?" He's always shown great appreciation for the US, and clearly loves living in New York… I don't know why Barnes is trying to play the Patriot Card…he's NOBODY's Solid Citizen….
E.D: Why don't you ask me if I care about what you just said...
Promo: [Rolling his eyes] Do you care?
E.D: NO!
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: And finally... Coming down the isle, he is the current BACW Heavyweight champion! Bad ass fans put your hands together for Michael Barnes!!!!
Crowd: [BOO!!!]
E.D: I love this guy!
Promo: In a homo way?
[Reaching back, Eric gives Paul a nasty open hand slap that knocks Prominski off his chair. Looking up with blood trickling from his mouth Paul quivers and says...]
Promo: What was that for?
E.D: Don't you ever call me a homo sweet cheeks!
[Reaching out his hand...]
E.D: Come on and get up here Paul I was only playing with you.
Promo: [Rubbing his face...] Jesus!!!
E.D: You know, I've been itching to slap the shit out of you for years and I have to admit, damn that felt good!
Promo: Let's go to the ring...
[Boxing style intros for this one which is apparently brought to us by Wrangler Jeans, where's Brett Favre?]
Referee: Ring the bell!
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
[As the bell rings Barnes fakes like he's going to lockup with the other two but then slides out of the ring and tells the other two to go at it. Gaetan and Kurt look at each other and then Kurt goes down to the floor to go after Barnes. LaValle also drops down to the floor on the other side to surround Barnes as Kurt nails Barnes with a right hand and both exchange rights on Barnes!]
Promo: Somehow I knew this was going to happen.
E.D: Kurt connects with a clothesline and then rolls Barnes back into the ring.
Promo: Barnes wants a timeout but LaValle nails him with a right hand as the two bounce Barnes back and forth between each other.
E.D: Kurt and LaValle whip Barnes into the ropes and connect with a double clothesline.
[Barnes tries to clothesline them both but they duck and then hit a double backdrop!]
Crowd: [POP!]
[Feeling the fans, the two then double clothesline Barnes out of the ring and down to the floor!]
[THUD!]
Promo: If this is the way it's going to go, I don't see Barnes leaving MSG with his belt around his waist.
E.D: STOP THE MATCH!!!
Promo: Huh?
E.D: See how stupid that sounds?
[LaValle sets up for a dive but Kurt stops him and goes for a dive of his own. Barnes moves out of the way, Kurt lands on the apron, and Barnes grabs his foot.]
Promo: Geatan races across the ring!
[With a head full of steam, LaValle hits a sliding dropkick to Barnes to knock him off Kurt and Chavez shakes his head in disbelief.]
----------------------Cut to the back----------------------
[We part from the action to see a backstage camera rushing down the hallway. Panning to the left, it moves into Mr. Batee's office. As we proceed, we see the door has been smashed in and all the furniture broken. Behind the desk you can see Chris Ross with his hands wrapped around Mr. Batee's throat.]
Mr. Batee: [Choking] Yo... y.. you... you're gonna kill me!!!
Chris Ross: That's why I have my hands around your neck Batee!!
Mr. Batee: P... p... pl... pleeease!
Chris Ross: I AM TIRED OF BEING SCREWED!!!
[Just as Batee turns a very cool shade of purple Ross releases the hold and the owner falls to the ground gasping for air.]
Mr. Batee: [Rubbing his neck] Wha... w... what do... you... want... this time... you... Hawaiian... maniac?
Chris: What would I like? Well to rid this earth of your slimy ways, to restore BACW back to it's hardcore glory... but if you're really asking, then I'm telling! I want a shot at whoever comes out of this match as BACW Heavyweight champion!
[Mr. Batee finally stands and replies...]
Mr. Batee: Then you might as well kill me.
Chris Ross: WHAT!!!!!
Mr. Batee: Look here Ross... BACW has been successful over the years because I never gave anyone anything they didn't deserve and I'm not going to start handling out title shots like candy just because you have your panties in a twist.
Chris Ross: What the hell do you call that match going on out there then?
Mr. Batee: What? Are you serious?!
Chris Ross: Kurt Chavez?!!! The guy is one chemo treatment away from having the worms eat his eye balls!
Mr. Batee: You realize Chavez has been the Empire State champ for a very long time right?
[Blank stare]
Mr. Batee: Anyway... His time has come and now it's going to go.
Chris Ross: How so?
Mr. Batee: I guarantee that when this match is over, we will never see Kurt Chavez again.
Chris Ross: What about me Batee? What about Chris Ross!!!
Mr. Batee: Clam down for a second would you? Look here Ross... This was going to be a surprise but since you practically strangled the shit out of me I'll let the cat out of the bag. See on the next TVMA we are going to have an Elimination Chamber match to see who gets a shot at the current BACW champ.
Chris Ross: Am I...
Mr. Batee: Of course you are! Now get the fuck out of my office before I take this gun out of my draw and shoot you between the eyes.
[Stepping over the rubble and out of the office Ross looks down with a puzzled gaze and says...]
SNAP!
SNAP!
Chris Ross: Batee, why is there a baby snapping turtle in your office?
Mr. Batee: I don't believe it...
Chris Ross: You know what Batee... On second thought I don't want to know what kind of freaky shit you're into.
Mr. Batee: LASHIEL!!!!!
WOOOSH!
[Back from the interruption Barnes is on offense now, but Kurt comes back on him and attempts to whip Barnes into the ropes. Barnes reverses it sending Kurt into LaValle who is on the apron knocking LaValle off!]
[CLANG!]
Crowd: OH!
Promo: LaValle hits the railing hard and that had to hurt!
E.D: Barnes grabs Kurt and hits a Back Suplex!
Referee: 1...2...
CrowD: NO!
Promo: LaValle breaks it up!
[After screaming at the referee, Barnes hits LaValle with a right hand and then puts the boots to him bad!! Barnes then slams LaValle into the corner and continues to put the boots to him some more. With hate in his heart, Mike then starts stomping on Kurt telling the crowd he's going to kill him before the cancer does.]
Crowd: [BOO!]
Promo: That was uncalled for...
E.D: That's was awesome!
[Staggering to his feet like road kill, LaValle comes out of the corner and tosses Barnes into it and nails him with right hands. Kurt comes over and starts hitting him too with left hands of his own.]
E.D: Is it me or is this the only way these two men can compete with Barnes?
Promo: To be honest I'm not really sure.
Referee: He's in the ropes! Back it up Gaetan!!!
[The referee pulls LaValle off of Barnes which allows Barnes to poke Kurt in the eyes and then slap LaValle on the back of the head to make LaValle think it was Kurt.]
Geatan LaValle: ??????
[With the confusion now in place, LaValle gets in Kurt's face and shoves him.]
Promo: Kurt shoves him back and the fight is on!
E.D: Barnes is a genius!!!
[They immediately lockup and start brawling around the ring until Kurt shoves LaValle into the ropes and then leapfrogs him...]
Promo: LaValle connects with Sole Food!
E.D: Shoulders to the canvas!!
Referee: 1...2...
E.D: NO!
Promo: LaValle kicks out!
E.D: Kurt goes for a vertical suplex but LaValle blocks it and connects with a leaping back kick.
[LaValle then hits a Russian leg sweep and then rolls backwards to his feet and leg drops Kurt's legs into a crazy pin!]
Promo: We have a new champion!!!!
Referee: 1... 2...
Crowd: THREE!!!!
E.D: NO!!!
Promo: Kurt kicks out!
[LaValle picks Kurt up but Kurt catches him with a leaping Enziguri out of nowhere!]
Crowd: [WOW!]
[Shaking out the cobwebs, Barnes slides back into the ring and slams Kurt into the ring post!]
Promo: Barnes quickly covers LaValle!
Referee: 1... 2...
E.D: Denied!!
Promo: I don't believe it he kicked out!
[Barnes puts the boots to LaValle and then drops an elbow on him for another near fall.]
E.D: Come on Mike! Show them why you're the champ!
[Pushing the referee to the side, Barnes picks LaValle up and slams him into the corner. LaValle tries to fight out but Barnes catches him with a knee and then whips him into the ropes and connects with a back elbow followed by a knee drop!]
Promo: We have cover!
Referee: ONE! TWO!!
Crowd: THREE!!!
Referee: TWO!!
[Still on the outside, Kurt tries to climb back in but Barnes dropkicks him to the floor and then spits on him.]
Promo: Come on!
E.D: Isn't Kurt used to having bodily fluids in his face?
Promo: You're disgusting!
[Inside the ring, Barnes chokes LaValle on the ropes and then picks him up. Not wanting to give an inch, Barnes and LaValle trade right hands in the center of the ring and then LaValle attempts a whip into the ropes but Barnes counters into a bone cracking spine buster!]
Promo: Shoulders to the canvas!
Referee: 1... 2...
E.D: NO!
Promo: LaValle kicks out again!
[Barnes picks LaValle up and goes for his finisher but Kurt comes from literally out of NOWHERE with a springboard flying forearm on Barnes!]
Crowd: [YEAH!]
Promo: Kurt follows up with a series of clotheslines and then he attempts to whip Barnes into the corner.
[Before the rebound, Barnes reverses it and then charges at Kurt but Kurt catches him with a back elbow and then he springs out of the corner! Kurt screams at Barnes to get up and then he goes for his finisher but Barnes blocks it and backdrops Kurt over the top!]
Crowd: This is awesome! Clap-clap-clapclapclap! This is awesome! Clap-clap-clapclapclap! This is awesome! Clap-clap-clapclapclap!
[Kurt lands on the apron and then sets up for a springboard move but Barnes shoves LaValle into the ropes causing Kurt to land hard on the top rope!]
Promo: Looking to even the odds, Barnes tosses LaValle out to the floor hard.
[THUMP!]
Michael Barnes: GET OVER HERE!
E.D: Barnes grabs Kurt and tosses him back into the ring.
Promo: Barnes hits a leaping pile driver!
Referee: 1... 2...
E.D: NO!
Promo: LaValle is able to come back in and break it up with a FIVE STAR FROG SPLASH!
E.D: LaValle is up to his feet and the crowd goes wild!
Crowd: [POP!]
Promo: LaValle hits a leg drop to Barnes's sternum followed by a sliding dropkick and then a clothesline!
E.D: This is incredible!!!
Promo: I know it is!!! LaValle follows up with a sit out front suplex!
[BOOM!]
[Looking to end it all, LaValle then hits a swinging neck breaker and climbs up top! Chris Ross climbs over the guardrail as the referee was looking at Kurt coming into the ring, and crotches LaValle on the top rope!]
[BOOM!]
E.D: Muscle buster off the top rope!!!
Promo: What the hell was that?
E.D: A muscle buster?
Promo: No... Ross' interference!
E.D: Clearly he's making a statement just like Jason Phoenix did earlier in the evening.
[Barnes grabs LaValle by the tights and covers him!]
Referee: 1... 2...
Promo: Chavez is trying to get back into the ring!
E.D: He's not going to make it!!!
Referee: THREE!!!
Crowd: [BOO!]
E.D: Kurt wasn't able to break it up!
Promo: I don't believe it! The man who hates Michael Barnes the most helped him to win?
E.D: Not necessarily Paul... Remember, Ross was pissed that Kurt and Gaetan were in this match to begin with and what a better way than to make sure Barnes was still the champ when he faced him but to help him to win.
[Ding! Ding! Ding!]
Stuffher: Your winner of the contest and now the Empire State and BACW Heavyweight champion! Michael Barnes!!!
Crowd: [BOO!]
Promo: Michael Barnes lives to fight another day and what can you say about Gaetan LaValle except...
[Prominski is interrupted as the arena lights flicker accompanied by the crackling sounds of electricity before going dim.]
E.D: I swear to God if you don't get your hands off my ass!
Crowd: [Stirring...]
Promo: WHAT?! My hands are right here!
E.D: YEAH! On my fucking ass!!!
[The Electric guitar tones pulse welcoming the introduction to Black Label Society's "Graveyard Disciples" as it blares from the public address system.]
E.D: Man is it date rape dark in here or is it just me?
Crowd: [Continues to buzz...]
Promo: I think you need to go back to grabbing your own ass and blaming it on me.
[Fog now rolls ominously down the ramp as a cold mist rains down upon the ring. Flashing bolts of light erupt from beside the ramp, crossing in an X ahead of the entryway before fading away. A man then steps from shadowed of obscurity through the fog that swirls around his boot clad feet.]
#Graveyard disciples march into the fields
Existence through destruction
The bodies beneath the wheels#
[Long red hair, streaked in places with black and pulled back with a ponytail hangs to the center of his back. His eyes are on the people, he's taking it all in, responding to all of them, reaching for them, the kids, the adults, the ladies, everyone whose reaching out to him he's reaching back. Heavy black and silver cargo pants and a black t-shirt with the logo of a distorted cemetery gate and several headstones round out the ring attire as he strides purposefully down the aisle.]
#The trip into the black
Life's dying fall#
[The cheering began almost as soon as he'd stepped out, A rolling tide of them, signs with his name on them for the first time in years he picked up one of them from a little boy and holds it high "Ulfric = Hardcore" and the fans seeing it cheer louder now before he hands it back, and sprints down the rest of the aisle, slipping inside and calling for a microphone.]
Crowd: [MEGA POP!]
Promo: Are you kidding me?!! What the hell is he doing here?
E.D: Maybe in the darkness he was the one who...
Promo: ENOUGH!!!
#Born to pull the trigger
Fuel to feed the hate
Innocence is shattered
The blood that cripples the hand of fate#
E.D: [In a mocking tone] Enough!
[Now in the ring, he catches the microphone when it's thrown, taps it to be sure it's on, the waits for the cheers to die, and waits.]
Ulfric: Madison Square Garden…BAC fuckin W!
[And the fans go absolutely fucking crazy...]
Ulfric: Hell yeah, that's what I love about this place! Listen to you bastards yell! Makes me want a body in the ring just so I have someone to toss through a table for you people!!!
Crowd: [POP!]
Ulfric: Give every last one of you something to remember!!!
Crowd: [More cheers, chants of "we want tables" fill the arena.]
Ulfric: Now if that don't bring a tear to the eye.
[He was grinning, soaking this all up...]
Ulfric: See I came out here before our main event because a part of me really wanted to do this with the World Heavyweight title over my shoulder, but hey, this is pro wrestling and shit happens and I've never been one to stand around and make excuses. It didn't happen; end of story, but it's not the end of MY story.
Promo: He would be thinking what I think he's thinking...
E.D: That he probably should have changed his diaper before getting into the ring?
Promo: Yeah I'll make sure to tell him you said that.
E.D: [Crazy eyes!!!!] ...
[The fans are hooked...]
Ulfric: I've been in the back for months, I've been listening to the tone, been getting a feel for things, been getting that itch to make my mark again. Battlecade was a taste; Wrestle Classic was a swallow, now I want the whole god damned bottle.
[He's pacing now, looking out at all the people as he talks.]
Ulfric: I've given a great deal of thought to this. And I can't stand here and honestly say that I'm done, that I've proved it all, that I've done enough. I can't stand here and be finished, so I've got to stand here and say to you all, that I want more, that I want to do it all over again that I want to show these young punks how to make a man bleed, break a man down and tear a fucking arena apart.
Crowd: [HUGE CHEERS!]
Promo: He just blew the roof off the arena with that implication and he isn't even done.
E.D: Look at his pants, he's done alright.
Ulfric: So, what I'm saying to you all is that I am formally declaring that I am not longer retired, nor am I still a free agent. I am a member of the BACW, BACW for life, and things in BACW are about to change! But I won't spoil the surprise right now by telling these three punks who are about to fight for my title what I have planned. No! Instead I'll let them stew on the fact that Ulfric is back and whoever wins tonight is going to be dead center in the middle of my fucking bull's eye!
Crowd: [ERUPTION!!!!]
[Microphone drop]
[Arms raised...]
[Standing on turnbuckle...]
Promo: Soaking up the cheers before heading back to the back, is it me or is Ulfric grinning like a devil who has just come home to hell?
E.D: By the smell of him I think hell is in his pants.
Promo: That's it folks we are out of time, so on behalf of BACW and Mr. Batee, we bid you good night from Madison Square Garden!
[At the top of the ramp, Barnes looks into the ring, and holding both belts up in the air makes a statement to Ulfric that he's not going anywhere.]
End ppv
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